Choices and regrets
by dilcirisse
Summary: Bilbo its sailing away to the afterlife. Could be considered deathfic


A fill for the hobbit kink meme on finding each other in the afterlife

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If he had to name a regret, even here were the waves washing the ship hull seemed to do the same with his pains, it would be not having seen the kingdom under the mountain for the last time; his kingdom, his tomb. Fitting that with so many memory's lost in the past few years those fleeting, fragile months more than 80 years ago were still clear as the mirror in front of him, who had no such qualms of showing him the truth of the ravages of time.

-Would you even recognize me anymore? Would you still see the feather headed spirited burglar who ran in your trail, or would you sneer at this fragile wilted shadow of him?

In the end it didn't matter, there would be no reunion, he was on this ship, with Frodo and Gandalf, one last adventure to a place of legends, and he was, who knew were he was. Did hobbits and dwarfs even go to the same place, was there a place at all? Maybe he had a kingdom there, a throne under the mountain, sitting to the right of his father, and grandfather, with all of those that came before. Corny wishful thinking it maybe be, but the alternative, of him being lost forever to the mists of death, dragged chocked sounds of anguish like claws on his chest. It was to late now, to take that chance, to stay and hope. Because; who would choose death over this white ship and its promise? Nobody that's it, nobody except him and not even because he hadn't found the courage or the clarity to do it. It had been a long time since he had felt the weight of his years like he was doing now, with each pain that went away memory and regret took its place, more heavy than any earthly malaise could be, not even while he had...not even while he had IT. Better not to go that road, it was gone and that particular burden with it. He should be counting his blessing's, go to the deck with Frodo, listen to someone else's adventures for a change instead of sulking the hours away, that he wouldn't like, he knew. Well then it wouldn't do right? he should start with up then, small steps.

-Uncle, I am glad to see you up, are you feeling better?

His dear Frodo, with so much to live and to heal ahead of him, something else he was to blame for to, and the dragging guilt of knowing that if he could, if he had the choice he would leave, again. But he had Gandalf didn't he? Gandalf would take care of Frodo, he always had, but he didn't had a choice, nowhere to go but ahead.

There is always a choice.

Now, that was interesting, specially since Frodo kept watching over the sea blissfully unaware, unless it was a figment of his senile mind.

There is always a choice Bilbo Baggins, is this yours?

Was it? Life or death, Frodo or... And shouldn't he take the sensible one? But maybe, maybe it was time to close his eyes and take another jump, like he did that morning he ran out of his living room towards the world. Let time take his due, that was his choice, if nothing else let it serve as penance.

So be it -Uncle whats wrong? Uncle...

The soft murmurs mixed and clashed with Frodo's panicked screams while the world faded to black, and it was Frodo's voice what welcomed him back from the black.

-I don't understand

-He is dying

The poor lad had apparently dragged the remaining white council to his beside, even Lord Elrond seemed distraught, he wished he could speak and put their fears to rest but he could barely feel his own body, was this death?

-But Gandalf you said...

-Yes dear lad, this shouldn't be happening, and we appear powerless to stop it.

But no he couldn't let this feeling lull him to complacency he had to say goodbye, he owed Frodo that, at the least. His voice when it came out hardly sounded like its own.

-Frodo my dear boy...

-Uncle, please hold on, we can...

-No lad, not this time, this is my choice, its time to leave Frodo I am so very sorry, I hope you''ll forgive me for my selfishness.

That seemed to do it, he had no force left but his point had come across if Lord Elrond down turned eyes and Gandalf tight smile and clear eyes were any indicator, tough Lady Galadriel countenance kept the same mysterious quality as always. But Frodo kept shaking his head with wet cheeks.

-Don't give up uncle, don't let it defeat you...

The lady was placing a soft gentle hand on Frodo's

-Do not worry your heart Frodo Baggins, for your uncle will be fine, after all, why else would he be here now?

Now that didn't make sense, of course he was here, were else would...Oh, apparently that he wasn't for him, now who would had tough that.

-You are late hobbit, like always, got lost in another dark tunnel?

Apparently he couldn't move but his eyes were still perfectly capable because everything was suddenly very wet and the world had stop moving for him outside the figure beside him.

-There its no time to be lazy, up you go.

Somehow he managed to find his voice

-I cant.

And hadn't he missed that laugh, deep and regal, even when gently condescendingly.

-Of course you can, common.

And he could apparently, who knew a extended hand could work so well to forget his weak bones, he felt so light to as if he had lost more than half his age while raising from the bed...oh...that was him on the bed to, with Frodo and Gandalf, but no, that wasn't him, not anymore. It was warm to, to bury his head in the coat fur, he hoped his wet smile was enough for Frodo to understand because he couldn't speak, it was to much, the warm, the fur the arms around him, and the whispers on his ear's.

-Silly hobbit, don't cry, the others are waiting.

And they were weren't there? Because the world was fading around the lips on his neck and he could ear a song and voices.

-Its that Bilbo? Hurry up the wine will run out. Well someone had to come and save the china. Do we have a handkerchief?

Yes the world was warm and perfect and it smelt like his pantry.

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Original prompt

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